Do Not Go Gently Into That Good Night

Kelsey Smith's recent disappearance and what looks like a very tragic conclusion, has rattled me. That could have been any one of us. How many of you went shopping this week? How many of you who went shopping this week have a plan for self defense? What does it involve? Do you rely solely on being able to pry a stun gun or mace from your purse? If so, have you ever practiced using them so that when the time came you could act effectively?

In college, I took a women's self defense course. Though my parents where incredulous that I chose to burn credit hours in such a class, the lessons I learned and practiced there have been invaluable too me. There have been a few situations where I needed to employ techniques and situations where this knowledge has empowered me to go about my daily life.

If you have the resources to attend this type of class I can not recommend it enough. In the mean time here are some tips and techniques you can mentally rehearse so you are prepared if you should ever need them:

** First and foremost- TRUST YOUR GUT - If something feels hinky, there's a good chance it is. Feel like someone is watching or following you? Act as though they are, don't brush it off as silly. Ask a friend, employee, security guard or police officer to walk you to your car. I've done this and never have been turned down, even in stores where they don't typically help you out to your car. Most shops will happily find someone. Is someone you know throwing off creepy vibes? Trust it. Most victims KNOW their attacker.

** Quiet and polite go out the window. If someone approaches you in a forceful manner or even just gives you that hinky feeling, toss social decorum right out the window. Use assertive body language in conjunction with direct commands "Stop!" "I don't know you" "Go away!" Should things escalate make the biggest scene of your life. Scream help, fire, 911, rape, no, stop. Throw things. Set off your car alarm. Appeal to passers by for help.

** Should someone lay hands on you, you need to fight. They most likely have a plan, one that they have thought about and rehearsed in their head. You need to foil this plan. Eye poking, biting, kicking, elbowing, foot stomping, head butting- do whatever it takes to get them away from you. As soon as you are free, RUN SCREAMING. Do not stay and fight. You can find some great specifics on how to fight back HERE.

** They've got a gun? Fight anyways. If they have a gun, they are most likely planning on using it. It is worth the risk to try and get away. If you obey and go with them, the chance of you winding up dead anyways are overwhelmingly high. Once they have taken you some place else where they feel more comfortable, you are at a major disadvantage.

It's sad that we need to discuss things like this, but entirely necessary. Empower yourself now, so you can survive later.