Dear Satan
I know that you are quite busy hatching nefarious plots and all but I was wondering if you had a moment, we need to talk. It seems that my daughter was recently switched with one of your spawn. At first I thought that she was just being a typical two year old but then THIS happened oh and THIS. While utterly nerve wracking, I could stretch to say that it is merely kid stuff. That she honestly had no concept of the fact that I JUST painted that wall or that those books did not belong to us. Her latest transgression,however, I find hard to dismiss.
Why yes, that is my filing cabinet and yes those are about 50 files dumped, scrambled and crumbled all over the floor. Yeah, and there's another 75-100 files in the pile not shown in this picture.... look familiar? I thought it might. One can always recognize the handy work of their children. My other big clue that she is one of your tiny minions?
note the horns and the reddish hue around her mouth. I'm almost 100% positive that is not as a result of strawberries but rather draining the blood from small woodland creatures and perhaps goats. I have no other choice but to demand that you return my darling angel immediately and that you send a competent secretary over to refile all of these papers for me.
Sincerely,
Fidget
Why yes, that is my filing cabinet and yes those are about 50 files dumped, scrambled and crumbled all over the floor. Yeah, and there's another 75-100 files in the pile not shown in this picture.... look familiar? I thought it might. One can always recognize the handy work of their children. My other big clue that she is one of your tiny minions?
note the horns and the reddish hue around her mouth. I'm almost 100% positive that is not as a result of strawberries but rather draining the blood from small woodland creatures and perhaps goats. I have no other choice but to demand that you return my darling angel immediately and that you send a competent secretary over to refile all of these papers for me.
Sincerely,
Fidget
posted by Fidget @ Wednesday, May 17, 2006
13 Comments:
At 11:33 AM,
T. said…
ROFL! If this works, and the Devil himself listens, let me know. Because somewhere at around age 3 I lost both my kids to him. Sure, he sent back his minions who look like my babies, but we all know that they aren't.
Sigh.
At 11:54 AM,
Melanie said…
She looks so much like you! Don't worry, the imp in her will leave when she is 30 or so.
At 12:03 PM,
Matthew said…
Hey, I like her style.
In fact, it's given me a few ideas ....
At 12:30 PM,
blackbeltmama said…
And I thought my daughter emptying her entire dresser was bad. I hope the "secretary" gets there soon.
At 2:22 PM,
occasionalconfusion said…
LOL She looks so angelic in that pic except for the horns. Let me ask you, since I don't have kids, yet, and I have always asked myself which would be the most drastic change when having a kid. What would you say it was the most drastic change in ur life after having the precious baby ?
At 2:30 PM,
Lyvvie said…
I once walked into the bathroom to find my daughter dancing about, singing and waving a bottle of baby powder everwhere. The room was white, the child was white and it took a couple hours of vacuuming to get cleared up. I must be the age.
Have faith, be strong, and be assured that she'll have child of her own one day.
At 3:58 PM,
melalyssa said…
Oh, no!! She strikes again! You really needed to reorganize your files anyway, right?!
BTW, we have exactly the same floor. What a bitch to keep clean, I hate mine....
At 4:37 PM,
Robyn said…
LMAO! Crazy! I love the tags at the end of the post too! satan spawn goat killing file explosion!
At 10:07 PM,
The Epiphany Artist said…
Let me tell you hon you will survive... my daughter called 911 and did heavy breathing into the phone... she drank a bottle of shampoo... she locked herself in the bathroom and we had to call the fireman to get her out...she fell out of a tree and broke her arm at the neigbors house...... Could be worse I have a relative who's kid manages to smear kah-kah on the wall somewhere everyday!Euuuuuu!
At 10:38 PM,
Ethel said…
Well, it's no consolation, I'm sure, but I was home sick all day and watched several episodes of Baby Story and other cute and cuddly biological clock stimulating programs.
I believe the snooze button has been hit once again.
I'd suggest an exorcism, but do you really want to clean up after the projectile vomitting?
At 10:55 PM,
Karen Rani said…
OMG that is soooo frekaing cute! I'm pretty sure your letter to Satan will be ignored though! He's ignored every one of my letters about Troll Baby!
At 11:07 PM,
Phain said…
"draining the blood from small woodland creatures and perhaps goats" This was the line that nearly made me wet myself!!
At 1:59 AM,
icancarryallthebagsandthebabiestoo said…
That is the funniest thing I have ever read in my life.
I died laughing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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