Sprinkle When You Tinkle?

Do you see that? Do you? It's positively disgusting. I hear the clamoring voices saying "Fidget, how can you say that's gross when you've posted pictures of your own piss?" SEE HERE Well, for one, my pee picture was taken in my home, not some public toilet where untold number of anonymous asses have sat. Second, my pee WAS IN THE TOILET. Now thinking about sharing a seat with people I don't know is pretty frightening but over time I have come to realize that thankfully I have an epidermis. It is an amazing organ. Not only can it produce disgusting things like pimples, it can protect me from contracting some funky ass disease left by someone else's pimply ass. That being said why do the women of America feel the need to hover? Ignore the fact that you have your skin to protect you, why not fashion a paper barrier out of toilet paper, or an even crazier idea... Use one of those paper toilet seat covers they provide in the dispenser over the toilet? I mean I know this is wacky and way off base but am I the only one that derives no pleasure sitting in someone else's urine? No after all the bitching it's not some flesh eating bacteria or STD I'm afraid of.. It's that unpleasant wet feeling... It ranks right up there with wearing wet socks. Anyways, back to the sprinkled toilet seat. Mira was jumping up and down like a drunken monkey screaming "I GOTTA PEE!" SO I scooped her up and charged towards the public restroom. We entered the "family stall" were we could both cop a squat (cue dueling banjos) when my plans were thwarted by the above sight - EW. Desperate, I found myself physically removing Mira from the toilet as soon as the tinkle parade stopped. I then had to limbo lower to get down on the kiddie toilet.. I'm not kidding look how low it is compared to the "normal" but still a little low for me seat

Being of lumberjack proportions (this is a direct quote from some shitty little mallrat who was walking behind me) you can imagine how interesting it was to piss with my knees by my ears. All of this could have been avoided if some stranger had just taken care to follow the golden showers rule "If you sprinke when you tinkle CLEAN IT UP!" Now admit it... Do you hover? If you do, why? Really I WANT to understand.