I need a kiss

I have a boo boo.. not an ordinary boo boo, mind you. It's plaguing me every moment of the day. Sitting, standing - there is no way to escape it. My supple behind is sad. My two cheeky gals were having a party while I was on the elliptical and I ended up with a butt blister! YIKES!!! Serves me right for going commando to the gym. So anyways I have this boo boo that needs to be kissed all better...