Spackling and she takes a dump

Let me preface this story with a gross yet necessary warning: Fried Jalapenos burn like the hell fires when they are on their way out after the natural process of digestion. WOOOOOOOWEEEEEE My biscuits are burning!!

We recently updated 5 of the windows in our new house. This required us to remove the lovely faux wood blinds we had installed. Said blinds are still not reinstalled because the walls now need patching around the windows. This of course takes time and DH steady spackling. I have been banned from spackling after I told DH my naughty hole patching story (which will follow this story). In any event we have been pinning comforters over the windows for privacy. Every morning Miss Mira climbs out of bed at some ungodly hour and rips the quilt off her window. I know this and expect it. Yet today when the fried jalapenos suddenly wanted to make an exit I forgot. Ran into the bathroom, hit the light, clawed off the panties and AHHHHH. The wee one bursts into the room throwing the door open and exposing me to anyone on the street. You see this house has a VERY unfortunate flaw. You can see clear through DDs' room into the bathroom and right at whomever is on the crapper. At about this time the neighbor was walking his dog Yukka when he caught sight of me. I am guessing he either thought I couldn't see him or was just too dumbfounded to think. I waved and then grabbed the toothpaste tub, using it like a gogo gadget arm to flip the light switch off. He wandered off giggling and I don't think I'll ever walk to pick up the mail again. I really don't want to have the "so did everything come out ok" conversation....

naughty spackling story: In my former single life I owned a parade of pets, which included a kick ass black lop eared rabbit named Harley and a little bastard hedgehog named Chester. Chester did NOT like Harley. I can't blame him for this b/c whenever Chester was running around in his hedgehog ball, Harley would hump the ball and douse poor Chester with bunny love gooze. As a result Chester had a deep seeded intolerance for the bunny and anything that smelled like the bunny - namely me after I had pet said bunny. One night I put Chester into the bathtub to run around without fear of bunny love. When I went to get him out of the tub there were hedgehog logs everywhere. I closed the bathroom door and set Chester on the floor. Next thing I know he's darted under the vanity and squeezed through a hole 1/4 of his size. Next thing I hear is a scurrying sound in the wall - son of a bitch!! CrazyC and I are banging on the wall trying to convince him it's not a cozy place to live and the prickly dork just won't believe us. So we bash a hole in the wall and start poking him in his spiney butt with the long handle of a back scratcher. He finally gets annoyed and climbs down but stays in the hole next to the vanity. CrazyC started shouting "I scoop you! I scoop you!" and using the clawside of the backscratcher to grab at him. After 20 minutes of scooping and me poking him through the hole he finally comes out. The landlord was due to visit that week so we had to patch up the evidence quick. We had some spackle on hand from a foot through the wall incident but none of the screen you use to cover over the hole. I surveyed our options and used an empty box from Astro Glide to stuff the hole and spackle it closed... I lived there another year or so, Chester however went on to live with a lovely English couple that had no bunnies and had an affinity for spiney grouchy hedgehogs. When DH came to my house he asked what happened to the wall... I told him the whole sorted story and have been forever banned from spackling and of course ever owning a hedge hog again